Old Boys Tie Manhattan Kickers 0-0 Then Explore Percy’s Wheat Beer-Cola Mix

Sep 16 2014 Published by under OldBoys

The Old Boys kicked off at 10am this week against a strong looking Manhattan Kickers side. Starting in the newly favored 4-4-2 formation, both teams moved the ball around quickly and with good retention. The Metro 1st division seems to play a higher tempo, less physical game, with the focus being upon accurate passing and better movement – a cast iron reflection of the game to come.

Throughout the first half Manhattan saw more of the ball whilst the best chances fell to the Old Boys. The Kickers goalkeeper was quick off his line to deny a one-on-one for Hureau, and then Levy put Jurgen von Goalhammer through who from a tight angle, saw his shot come off the outside of the goalkeepers near post.

Manhattans best chance was a through ball, that Becker came out and dealt with by kicking the ball clear of danger. The defensive communication between Becker and Edmunds (a rouse for so much despair over seasons past) was, such a leap from previous methods of communication it made the release of the smartwatch a peripheral event in modern day communication news. No longer the Ike and Tina of the Old Boys backline, it was Simon and Garfunkel through soccer incarnation.

The second half was much to the Old Boys advantage. A whisper of a fitter team has been doing the rounds, and with Stower lasting to the 60th minute until eventually being substituted (a lighter shade of purple than usual), this claim carries some weight. Sawyer picked up a yellow card for questioning a contentious refereeing decision before seeing the best chance of the second half cleared off the line by an outstretched keepers leg. Questions of whether a squared ball could have produced a better result were called from the sidelines, but being the 85th minute, the CPR no.9 had already (and reluctantly) used up both of his passes for the mornings game.

At the other end Luciano and Paul kept the towering Kickers striker under close watch. For those of us fortunate enough to receive the managers pre game opposition analysis (I’m still waiting on mine and not holding my breath) it seems the ‘Andy Carrol long ball game’ was exactly what the tired legs were aiming for. The final throw of the dice saw Levy denied a STONE WALL PENALTY by a somewhat senile, arthritic, and short sighted referee. The final result was that both teams ended with exactly the same amount of goals, as the days Edmunds has to work this week… Zero.

Topics from the post-match review @ Percy’s Tavern:

What is this strange wheat beer and Coca-Cola drink that fuels von Goalhammer?

How many lieutenants did Bill have to go check on post-match at the St Gennaro festival?

How many more of these jokes can the author get away with before he has ‘an accident’?

Does Andy bringing a child to the Miami soccer trip, enable the rest of us to get a free pass for this trip under a ‘family event’ citation?

Who taught Becker 4-4-2?

By David Sawyer

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